just you wait.

It’s one of those phrases people toss around casually... but it always lands heavy. You hear it all the time.

AND IT’S SO ANNOYING.

Just you wait until you’re 30.
Just you wait until you have kids.
Just you wait until you have two kids... or three… or four.
Just you wait until you’re married.
Just you wait until you’ve been married for a long time.
Just you wait until you own a house.
Just you wait until you hit your 40s.
Just you wait until you’re running a business.
Just you wait until you’ve been doing it for ten years.
Just you wait until you get older and your metabolism crashes.
Just you wait until life gets “really hard.”

The problem with it

The pattern is always the same. It’s negative. It’s a warning. It’s someone projecting their burnout, fear, or hardship onto your future. It’s almost never said with joy, encouragement, or hope.

No one ever says..
Just you wait until you see how amazing it is to watch your kids grow.
Just you wait until you realize how confident you’ll feel in your 30s, 40s, etc.
Just you wait until you see how good life can be when you surround yourself with the right people.
Just you wait until you step into your purpose and everything starts to click.
Just you wait until you fall in love with your life.

It’s always the hard. Never the good. And honestly, I’m done with it.

There’s this strange tone of competitiveness underneath it. Like we’re all playing a game of who’s more tired, who has it harder, who’s struggling more. It invalidates your present and robs you of the joy in the moment. It tells you, “Sure, you're doing fine now, but just wait... things will get worse.”

And sometimes, yeah, life does get harder. Seasons shift. More responsibilities come.

But hard doesn’t have to mean miserable.

Change doesn’t have to mean dread.

And the next season doesn’t automatically cancel out the goodness in the one you’re in now.

So What If We Flipped It?

What if we started saying things like...

Just you wait until you realize how deeply loved your child will make you feel.
Just you wait until you surprise yourself with how strong and capable you are.
Just you wait until you buy your first home and feel that pride every time you walk through the door.
Just you wait until you enter a new decade with more clarity, confidence, and fewer people-pleasing tendencies.

There’s so much joy in the unknown. So much good still ahead. Just because a season comes with challenges doesn’t mean it’s all bad. Life is hard, but it can also be deeply good.

HONESTLY, IT Comes From Intention

I’ve worked hard to shape my mindset, and also to build a life that I genuinely like. I know hard things will come. I know I can’t control everything. But I can choose how I talk about life... and how I experience it.

I want to live in gratitude. I want to speak life over others. I want to enjoy every part of the ride, not brace for impact every time something changes.

So maybe instead of throwing around “just you wait” as a threat, we use it as a promise.

Just you wait...
Until you’re surrounded by people who believe in you, who celebrate your growth, who aren’t completing for who has it worse.
Until you build something you’re proud of.
Until you stop living life by someone else’s checklist.
Until you feel free.

I want to live in that kind of “just you wait.”
And I want you to experience it too.

— Nicole 🖤

P.S. I’m turning on the comments, and I want to hear from you! What “just you wait” phase has someone said to you? What do you wish they would’ve said?