I Started Over Again (and Again… and Again)
Spoiler alert: That’s not failure. That’s growth.
I’ve started over more times than I can count.
My health journey? Lost it. Found it. Hospitalized. Healed. Moved. Gained. Lost again. My weight has yo-yo’d thanks to chronic illness (shoutout to my pancreas for being dramatic), major life changes, and just—well—being a human in a body that changes.
I’ve started businesses, changed industries, launched new ideas, closed chapters, and moved states away from my hometown with no backup plan except for the man I married (thank God he stuck with me). It hasn’t been easy, but it’s been mine.
The truth is, illness has been the biggest reset button of my life.
It flipped everything upside down. It was devastating and traumatic—but somehow also became the push I needed to move forward, reevaluate what matters, and stop wasting time waiting for things to magically change.
I’ve burnt myself out from chasing everything at once without a clear plan or purpose. But here’s the truth: I love a lot. I want a lot. And I’m not going to apologize for living this life all-in.
Let’s talk about the narrative.
Some people call me inspiring. Some call me flaky.
Some see a woman who keeps trying.
Others see someone who can’t make up her mind.
But honestly? I wouldn’t change any of it.
Because I’ve tried more than most.
I’ve taken risks. I’ve pivoted.
And I’ve held nothing back.
If that makes me a little chaotic? So be it. I’m still here. Still dreaming. Still doing.
Here’s what I’ve learned about starting over:
It’s okay. Necessary even.
But don’t do it out of pure emotion—do it with intention.
Ask yourself why you're restarting.
Are you burned out? Avoiding something? Hoping for an easier route?
Or are you brave enough to recommit with a clearer mind?
Because newsflash:
Every business takes work.
Every relationship takes work.
Every body transformation takes work.
It’s not supposed to be easy. It’s supposed to be worth it.
So how do I keep going?
I go back to my why. Every single time.
I’ve got big dreams. Insane goals.
And I know for a fact I’m not going to reach a single one of them by sitting back and watching everyone else live their life.
I want more. For myself, for my family, for my future.
I want to change the generational story.
I want to build something that outlives my excuses.
Final word?
Yes, starting over counts.
But only if you're doing it from a place of growth—not as a cop-out.
If you're constantly chasing the easier way, the faster fix, the prettier version… you’ll keep spinning your wheels.
But if you’re willing to start over with purpose?
You’re already ahead of most people who never try.
So here's to the again.
And again.
And again.
We’re not starting from scratch—we’re starting from experience.
— Nicole 🖤